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Skript kiddie

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Leet crew.jpg


The face of the enemy. Not pictured: butter.
Typical script kitty. See also porsche and poko ono.

Skript Kiddies, Script Kiddies, Skids, or Script Kittens are individuals who go about trying to cause things to happen using computers that, are either frowned upon, unexpected, or malicious in nature. The tragedy of the typical script kiddie is that he approaches software the way a priest approaches the eucharist: he is so in awe at the magic of computers, that he looks to them like a sacrament from God. He therefore does not have the patience or the mental stamina to 'hack', and so uses the scripts and programs developed by others to wreak havoc on those lazy bums who cannot bother to secure their systems.

Most script kiddies spend most of their time on IRC (usually from g00ns, #calmdown on anonnet) trumpeting their 1337 h4X0ring skillz. They are usually teenagers looking for social acceptance through the internets. The majority of script kiddies are boys, but there are a few boys pretending to be girls around as well. Naturally, since most of these kids are too nerdy to get a date IRL, gaining the attention of the opposite sex is often the motive for much script kiddie exploits. Crews are formed, alliances shift, jealousies inflame -- all for a little fame that the rest of the world is oblivious towards.

To call someone a script kiddie is usually to insult their intellect, saying to the person: 'you wish to be considered a hacker, but you cannot teach yourself to develop the tools necessary to accomplish what you want'.

Script kiddies are known for blanking wiki pages and writing U GOT HAXED. They also find it very fun to exploit coding vulnerabilities.

The word skid very aptly means fart when using the unknown scripting language known as Danish.


Skript kiddie fashion and habits

Due to their usually underaged b& status, skript kiddies have an obsessive tendency towards:

  • making things look obnoxious in an ADHD way, meaning blinking text, animated backgrounds, and horrible forced technomusic that has nothing to do with a keygen program.
  • Using overly "cool" and "industrial" things like phosphor green, consoles, naïve admiration of cyber-punk, and Matrix-style hero complexes.

Where this differs from your twenty-something or thirty-something hacker/coder/IT-specialist is its obsessive nature and the disconnection between the pragmatic origin (eg. phosphor screens: reality on Apple II, console: faster to write a CLI than a GUI) of the phenomenon and its superficial advertisement and bricolage. Skript kiddies use these things as a status symbol, like the(now dethroned) leading fucks of Soviet Union used the hammer and sickle.

Some have to learn the hard way. Mark being a script sperm.jpg

How to be a skript kiddie

  1. View source
  2. Simply become a user of chatnets or:
  3. Download BackTrack Linux, nmap, sshnuke, a CS wallhack tool, Back Orifice, NetBus, SubSeven, and all sorts of botnet tools.
  4. Gather and/or join a botnet.
  5. Talk out of your ass.
  6. Hack every IP you see.
  7. DDoS every IP you can't hack.
  8. Troll everyone you can't DDoS.
  9. Hack everyone you can't troll.
  10. Email bomb the admins you can't hack.
  11. Brag about stuff you didn't even do.
  12. Call other hackers script kiddies.
  13. Troll everyone who calls you a script kiddie.
  14. Put a floodnet on #wikipedia.
  15. Blank pages on every wiki you find.
  16. Call everything that walks a fucktard.
  17. Download other hackers' tools then claim that you wrote them.
  18. Get beaten up by your friends who you hacked by accident.
  19. Get banned from the internet.
  20. Threaten to kill yourself and blame your hacker friends when you get arrested.
  21. Boners.
  22. ????
  23. Profit!

Skript kiddie inventions

Most of them are batch scripts full of false command and unnecessary pauses to make it look like it actually works.

Scriptkiddie thoughts:

Hey, maybe people will think I'm a die-hard programmer if I add this!!

ECHO p.11.1..11..1.12..21.1111.000..d..5..

Translation into 1337

Just so Skript Kiddies can understand, here is the entire article written in 1337.


Skr1pt K1dd13s, Scr1pt K1dd13s 0r s'K1dd13s 4r3 1nd1v1du4ls wh0 g0 4b0ut try1ng t0 c4us3 th1ngs t0 h4pp3n us1ng c0mput3rs th4t 4r3 31th3r fr0wn3d up0n, un3xp3ct3d 0r m4l1c10us 1n n4tur3. Th3 tr4g3dy 0f th3 typ1c4l scr1pt k1dd13 1s th4t h3 4ppr04ch3s s0ftw4r3 th3 w4y 4 pr13st 4ppr04ch3s th3 3uch4r1st: h3 1s s0 1n 4w3 4t th3 m4g1c 0f c0mput3rs, th4t h3 l00ks t0 1t l1k3 4 s4cr3m3nt fr0m G0d. H3 th3r3f0r3 d03s n0t h4v3 th3 p4t13nc3 0r th3 m3nt4l st4m1n4 t0 'h4ck', 4nd s0 us3s th3 scr1pts 4nd pr0gr4ms d3v3l0p3d by 0th3rs t0 wr34k h4v0c 0n th0s3 l4zy bums wh0 c4nn0t b0th3r t0 s3cur3 th31r syst3ms.

M0st scr1pt k1dd13s sp3nd m0st 0f th31r t1m3 0n 1RC trump3t1ng th31r 1337 h4X0r1ng sk1llz. Th3y 4r3 usu4lly t33n4g3rs l00k1ng f0r s0c14l 4cc3pt4nc3 thr0ugh th3 1nt3rn3ts. Th3 m4j0r1ty 0f scr1pt k1dd13s 4r3 b0ys, but th3r3 4r3 4 f3w b0ys pr3t3nd1ng t0 b3 g1rls 4r0und 4s w3ll. N4tur4lly, s1nc3 m0st 0f th3s3 k1ds 4r3 t00 n3rdy t0 g3t 4 d4t3 1n r34l l1f3, g41n1ng th3 4tt3nt10n 0f th3 0pp0s1t3 s3x 1s 0ft3n th3 m0t1v3 f0r much scr1pt k1dd13 3xpl01ts. Cr3ws 4r3 f0rm3d, 4ll14nc3s sh1ft, j34l0us13s 1nfl4m3 -- 4ll f0r 4 l1ttl3 f4m3 th4t th3 r3st 0f th3 w0rld 1s 0bl1v10us t0w4rds.

T0 c4ll s0m30n3 4 scr1pt k1dd13 1s usu4lly t0 1nsult th31r 1nt3ll1g3nc3, s4y1ng t0 th3 p3rs0n: 'y0u w1sh t0 b3 c0ns1d3r3d 4 h4ck3r, but y0u c4nn0t t34ch y0urs3lf t0 d3v3l0p th3 t00ls n3c3ss4ry t0 4cc0mpl1sh wh4t y0u w4nt'.

Scr1pt k1dd13s 4r3 kn0wn f0r bl4nk1ng w1k1 p4g3s 4nd wr1t1ng U G0T H4X3D.

5kr1pt k1dd13z |3e 1i|<3 d|5

|)u3 70 7|-|3|r u5u411`/ u|\||)3r493|) 8& 5747u5 5|<r||>7 |<||)|)|35 |-|4\/3 4|\| 085355|\/3 73|\||)3|\|(`/ 70\\/4r|)5:

  • M4|<||\|9 7|-|||\|95 100|< 08|\|0><|0u5 ||\| 4|\| 4|)|-||) \\/4`/, M34|\|||\|9 81||\||<||\|9 73><7, 4|\||M473|) 84(|<9r0u|\||)5, |-|0rr|813 |=0r(3|) 73(|-||\|0Mu5|((7|-|47 |-|45 |\|07|-|||\|9 70 |)0 \\/|7|-| 7|-|3 |<3`/93|\| |>r09r4M `/0u \\/r073).
  • 0\/3r1`/ "(001" 4|\||) "||\||)u57r|41" 7|-|||\|95 1||<3 |>|-|05|>|-|0r 9r33|\|, (0|\|50135, |\|4|\/ë 4|)M|r47|0|\| 0|= (`/83r-|>u|\||< 4|\||) |-|3r0-(0M|>13><35. 7|-|3 0u7\\/4r|)1`/ 5`/M8015 0|= |-|4(|<3r5. \\/|-|3r3 7|-||5 |)||=|=3r5 |=r0M `/0ur

7\\/3|\|7`/-50M37|-|||\|9, 0r 10|\|9-83|-|01|) 7|-||r7`/-50M37|-|||\|9 |-|4(|<3r/(0|)3r/|7-5|>3(|41|57 |5 |7'5 085355|\/3 |\|47ur3 4|\||) 7|-|3 |)|5(0|\||\|3(7|0|\| 837\\/33|\| 7|-|3 |>r49M47|( 0r|9||\|(39. |>|-|05|>|-|0r 5(r33|\|5: r341|7`/ 0|\| 4|>|>13 ||, (0|\|5013: |=4573r 70 \\/r|73 4 (1| 7|-|4|\| 4 9u|) 0|= 7|-|3 |>|-|3|\|0M3|\|0|\| 4|\||) |7'5 5u|>3r|=|(|41 4|)\/3r7|53M3|\|7 4|\||) 8r|(01493. 5|<r||>7 |<||)|)|35 u53 7|-|3 ||\|57ruM3|\|7 45 4 5747u5 5`/M8015, 1||<3 7|-|3(|\|0\\/ |)37|-|r0\\/|\|3|)) 134|)||\|9 |=u(|<5 0|= 50\/|37 ru55|4 u53|) 7|-|3 |-|4MM3r 4|\||) 5|(|<13.

H0w t0 b3 4 skr1pt k1dd13

  1. D0wnl04d nm4p, sshnuk3, 4 CS w4llh4ck t00l, B4ck 0rr1f1c3, N3tBus, SubS3v3n, 4nd 4ll s0rts 0f b0tn3t t00ls.
  2. G4th3r 4nd/0r j01n 4 b0tn3t.
  3. T4lk 0ut 0f y0ur 4ss.
  4. H4ck 3v3ry 1P y0u s33.
  5. DD0S 3v3ry 1P y0u c4n't h4ck.
  6. Tr0ll 3v3ry0n3 y0u c4n't DD0S.
  7. H4ck 3v3ry0n3 y0u c4n't tr0ll.
  8. 3m41l b0mb th3 4dm1ns y0u c4n't h4ck.
  9. Br4g 4b0ut stuff y0u d1dn't 3v3n d0.
  10. C4ll 0th3r h4ck3rs scr1pt k1dd13s.
  11. Tr0ll 3v3ry0n3 wh0 c4lls y0u 4 scr1pt k1dd13.
  12. Put 4 fl00dn3t 0n #w1k1p3d14.
  13. Bl4nk p4g3s 0n 3v3ry w1k1 y0u f1nd.
  14. C4ll 3v3ryth1ng th4t w4lks 4 fuckt4rd.
  15. D0wnl04d 0th3r h4ck3rs t00ls th3n cl41m th4t y0u wr0t3 th3m.
  16. G3t b34t3n up by y0ur m4t3s wh0 y0u h4ck3d by 4cc1d3nt.
  17. G3t b4nn3d fr0m th3 1nt3rn3t.
  18. Thr34t3n t0 k1ll y0urs3lf 4nd bl4m3 y0ur h4ck3r fr13nds wh3n y0u g3t 4rr3st3d.
  19. B0n3rs
  20. ???
  21. Pr0f1t!!!

Famous Skript Kiddies

Skript kiddie
is part of a series on
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AspierationsBLANKING IN PROGRESSCharming NaïvetéDelete fucking everythingDOIN IT RONGFailing itInternet tough guyKids on the internetLegal actionLiberalismMental illnessSkript kiddieSob StoriesTrollsUnrealistic ExpectationsUnwarranted Self-ImportanceWaaaambulance

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An heroGoing Back To GaiaLURKING MOARShutting The Fuck UpStopping posting

Skript kiddie is part of a series on Security Faggots

1337 h4x0rz

Captain CrunchDavid L. SmithGary McKinnonGOBBLESHD MooreJeff MossKevin MitnickLance M. HavokRobert MorrisTheo de RaadtweevWoz


AnonOpsBrian SalcedoCult of the Dead CowFearnorFry GuyGadi Evrong00nsHack This SitehannJoanna RutkowskaJohn FieldJoseph CampLulzSecMarshviperXMasters of DeceptionMichael LynnKrashedRavenr000tRyanSteve Gibsonth3j35t3rSabuZeekill

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