From Encyclopedia Dramatica
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Unlike bigots, Racists believe that each of humanity's different races possess unique traits and skill sets, just like in Dungeons and Dragons. Most of the time, the word "racist" is actually misapplied, and is used in situations where treatment or attitude toward one person is found to be less favorable than toward another. For example, the statement "That's racist towards women" is in fact is "Sexism", not racism, because women are not a unique race. (However, they are dumber than men and would be better off in the kitchen making a sandwich.) The statement "That's racist towards gays" is also a misapplication of the term racism, as homosexuality is not a race, but rather a type of alien.
There are generally two different types of racists: AWESOME racists who dress in elaborate costumes, gets tattoos, and flaunt their racism i.e. The Black Panthers, KKK, and Skinheads. Then there are PUSSY racists who hide their racism when in public i.e. cops, suburban eye-talian families and Christfags.
Racism is very socially acceptable even though never stated in the rules. Racism is best used to its full potential if one is a White (snow nigger) person or Jew (gold nigger) keeping down Blacks (niggers), Indians (curry niggers), Arabs (sand niggers), Chechens (hill niggers?), Native Americans (prairie/timber niggers) and other non-Whites. Although white racism is often in reply to the intolerant demands of certain other cultures, including Jews, and others named above, or those that claim to represent them. Combined with a high concentration of rhetoric, logic and facts, racism against these groups equates to a figurative atomic lulz bomb or better. Even though the victim of racism generally does not appreciate it, racism in fact promotes cultural awareness. That is to say, it makes everyone else aware about how stupid, shitty and undeveloped their culture is while making yourself look like God by comparison.
Using so-called "racist language", such as nigger, chink, porch monkey, zipper-head, spear-chucker, jigaboo, wetback, gook, paki, abbo, cash-mongering hook-nosed greasy Yid, vicious child-licking gold-sniffing Hebe freak, soap-fearing bean-sucking lazy rape-happy Mexicant, chimptastic welfare-absorbing piss-brained rubber-lipped chicken-stinking ass-lusting Coon, to name but a few, on the internets can induce lulz not just for the offense it causes, but for all the butthurt faggots (note: "faggot"
isn't racist either! yes is it. Fags are a race all their own, faggot Wrong. A nigger who likes it in the butt (What? What?) is still a nigger, albeit a gaynigger.) who write long tirades about how the "whole racist thing is getting old" and that you're being "more irritating than offensive." This is, of course, bullshit; if they really weren't offended by your sudden dropping of the word "nigger", they wouldn't have bothered to type a reply in the first place. Pointing this out, as well as the way that many people take racism on the internets as EXTREMELY SERIOUS BUSINESS, is a prime source of lulz. Unless, of course, you're a faggot, or a nigger, or an Arab Indian Muslim native mexicunt, or a mexicunt nigger native, or any of those combinations, understand? (I know, however, that you don't because you're an uneducated nigger.)
Racism between the races
According to popular consensus on Tumblr, racism is a lot like a fire in that it requires three elements to exist. In fire's case, it needs a source to fuel it, air to burn and a spark to light it. In the case of racism, however, Tumblr argues that the magic Triforce requires are the three Ps: power, privilege and prejudice, and without all three of them it is impossible to be a racist. Therefore, according to Tumblr, because black people have no power or privilege they cannot be racist.
However, some argue that this a load of horseshit put in place so that butthurt niggers don't have to worry about being considered hypocritical in their racist views of those damn crackers that are apparently always oppressing them and that, in point of fact, holding negative beliefs about a group of people based solely on the color of their skin or their ethnic background does in fact make you a racist, regardless of how much supposed 'power' or 'privilege' that you may or may not have.
As we shall see, racism is not a problem unique to one particular ethnic group. A white person can be racist towards blacks. A Pakistani can be racist towards Indians. Chinese can be racist towards whites. Arabs can be anti-Semitic as fuck. The Japanese hate everybody.
Racism or Realism?
It's one thing to make accusations about a race without backing it up, and another to make sense out of it. Look at Hitler for example: he killed the Jews because he knew they were parasitic interlopers that corrupted the economy. And look! Germany went from shit to a super power that buttfucked almost every country in Europe (especially France) and emerged as a manufacturing powerhouse after the war, despite being bombed to shit by the Zionist-manipulated goyim, er... "Allies". Nevertheless, he did a good job. Although he's not popular IRL he is God among gods in places like /b/ and this place here, and even though not making the popular decision, made the right decision. Also, he had a pleasing odor of zesty mango from all that vegitarianism.
The same can be said about South Africa and Zimbabwe. Both nations had all-white regimes that understood the simple fact that blacks do not know how to run countries. As soon as they were sanctioned into oblivion by the butthurt UN, their predictions and warnings became reality. The African'ts filled both governments with niggers interested only in getting rich at the people's expense and busting a cap in anyone's ass who dares question their policies. Now all of Africa is overrun with crime, AIDS, and fail.
Experts say that there is only a 1-2% difference between the human and chimp genomes; this implies that even tiny differences between human genomes could be important---a half-percent difference between your genome and some African savage's would mean that he'd be 25-50% closer to being a chimp than you, or (and more likely) vice versa.
Apparently, if you're racist towards a black person, you'll most likely lose your job and get involved in a lawsuit.
HOWEVER, if a nigger is racist towards a whitey, you can complain about it under the guise of not complaining about it by using the age old phrase "Hey it's racist when I do it, but when you do it, it's not racist?" It's the perfect way to blatantly call out a nigger's racism without directly stating that its racist, therefore saving you from looking like the hypocrite that you really are. But if you DO decide to, everyone will just say "Who gives a fuck?". Because no one really cares.
Conversation between a Logical Realist and an R-tard
"Racist" (also b/tard): I believe that negroes are a burden to some societies such as the US or parts of Europe. They lower the standards of education, and have shown so in the US since the 1950's, and as you've seen the US has fallen in educational standards. They also take up a large part of the welfare, and have incredibly high amounts of abortion. Ever since the negroes started being accepted in the US its standards for education, its GDP and such has fallen. I've made my research and can conclude that negroes are a downfall for societies.
Liberal/Democrat/R-tard/Nigger: DATZ RACISTT!!!!!!!!!11!!!!!!!
"Racist": I'm just telling it like it is.
Liberal/Democrat/R-tard/Nigger: EVERYONE LOOK ITS A RACIST DURRRRRRRRRRRRR
— -- David Irving, IRL trollmaster supreme
Racism Is Lulz
for a song-and-dance number.
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—Traditional Texas wisdom.
- Caucasoids (cock-ae-soyds): Caucasoids aka ice niggers hail from the temperate lands of Europe, western Asia and North Africa. They're the most awesome of the races, capable of shitting all over tropical and sub-Arctic territories. They are the premiere winners of civilization and are responsible for single-handedly locking humanity into goat-fucking savagery, contrary to what the white-loving Jews and weeping vagina LIBRULS will try to tell you. They learn SELF-DESTRUCT at level 10 due to comfort-induced stupidity and complacency otherwise known as Liberalism. Recommended character class: Cleric, as white people love to fuck children Downside: They are the source of emos, wiggers, and contemporary jazz. Also a chance of Irish Upside: +10 point genocide bonus. When provoked, Whites will unleash serious raep and lulzworthy mass-murder on unsuspecting Jews (actually, no, cause it is known that the Jews did all the holocausts).
- Mongoloids: Mongoloids aka Rice Niggers come from the exotic lands of east Asia. Their society simultaneously contains depressing unemployment with dog/baby consumption and requires them to emigrate to all corners of the world (or Vancouver, Canada), thus giving them a bonus to infiltration, spying, despotism and lack of foresight from small eyes. They also gain a dexterity bonus from playing Starcraft and sewing knock-off footwear. Their overcrowded cities have given them a smaller, effeminate stature, earning them penalties to strength and charisma (unless they're girls, 'cause Asian chicks are hot). Recommended character class: Laborer, as those Asians are always making Air Jordans. Downside: Males are surly, effete and bad-smelling; ant-like conformity makes them more or less biological robots. Upside: Women are docile and childlike, with sweet faces and teenage-looking bodies
- Negroids: aka Niggers hail from the arid lands of sub-Saharan Africa. They are the missing evolutionary link between humans and the great ape lineage, but are still an expressive (child rape) and free-spirited (explosive AIDS epidemic, lol) race. Their primitive living conditions and harsh climate resulted in a increase in their physical strength (not to be confused with well-fed North American nigger imports). Their culture of hunting and gathering has also given them a bonus to stamina, which is mostly used during riots, running (with stolen chikinz and/or a whore) or when raping the young White wimmenz. They gain a penalty to intelligence, however, from "the man" always keeping them down. Recommended character class: Drow, 'cause niggas be magic on de dance flo'. Downside: They are niggers. Upside: Good cannon fodder and field labor; males are entertaining and good-natured when kept "in their place" (cotton field). PROTIP: Negroid women contain only 49% human DNA; do not approach. TRUTH. SMHSMHSMHSMHSMHSMHSMHSMH lol minorities can't do anything right.
- Semites: aka Kikes Hailing from the Holy Land, Jews have kinky hair like niggers but are
notniggers, have yellowish skin like Azns but are not Azn, and occasionally might look White but are not White. Semites usually occupy themselves by counting shekels or performing primitive religious rituals such as praying to a black meteorite or sucking infant cocks. When they are not doing those two activities they are creating new religions such as Christianity and killing fags who worship rocks. When that fails they are complaining about the past having a lot to complain about such as the Holohoax and anti-Semitism. In reality there are not many Semites left; however, Jews still use the word as something exclusive and the word anti-Semitism has become a crime for other Semites such as Arabs and Ferengi. The Jew are by far the most bigoted and racist of the races, having developed a very exclusive and xenophobic culture and language to deliberately demean all non-jews. The recommended class for a Semite is Thief. Downside: God's chosen people, yet God insists on killing them off, WTF? Upside: Most manipulative race; diabolical cleverness has enabled them to survive, infiltrate their host civlization and dominate showbiz with shamless self-promotion. Good at math, hiding wealth, playing string instruments on rooftops. Also doing WTC. Preferred Class: Thief. Women: Just like sand niggers, Jews are not sexually dimorphic, meaning their females are identical to male specimens. Sabras and Jews from outside the Northeastern U.S. may be approached with caution; curly-haired Noo Yoak/Lawn Guyland subspecies should be avoided at all costs. WARNING The Jewess becomes an unstoppable sex machine when under the thrall of a Gentile man.
- Hispanics: aka beaners, spix, wetbacks, burrito bashers, FredJuicy Invented in a newspaper article in the 1980s, Hispanics are
the Ultimate Racefat because they can eat anything. Hispanic x White = Hispanic. Hispanic x Black = Hispanic. Hispanic x freshly converted Orthodox Jewish Orangutang = Hispanic. They can even choke down guacamole. You can even be a Klansman and be a Hispanic. You don't even have to know Spanish - the only restriction is that you can't be Spanish, because people from Spain are white. (Also people from Rome can't be Latin) For some funny reason Hispanics are the fastest growing minority. Join for the lulz, the wacky TV channels, the twelve-year-old working girls in the Mexican cantinas, to get on the ground floor in the new American cartel interim government, the mail order brides, or to have a chance of being hired because companies think you're an illegal immigrant. Preferred Class: Lawnmower. Downsides: They all smell like fucking shit and are incapable of traveling in vehicles that do not contain three times as many beaners as seats. Upside: Capable of igniting massive shitstorms of butthurt, riots, and lulz when they shoot deserving niggers, thus beginning CHIMPOUT 2013! Hopefully this will swiftly result in Mighty Whitey bringing the IRL banhammer down on many, many spix and niggers, thereby making the world that much of a better place.
- Other: Aboriginal and native races. These classes (e.g. the Irish) have since been pulled from game play, and as such are of no further consequence.
Examples of Racists
In Encino Man, Pauly Shore's character is a racist jew who says the "serious beak" is but one reason his blonde and blue-eyed friend will never win back his former girlfriend from the guy who she is with after last summer. While the faith of Michael DeLuise is unknown, suffice to say Pauly likes the bump in his nose.. Additionally, the movie portrays cro-magnon man as looking essentially identical to anglo-saxons in California, where he is discovered buried in ice.
—The only real racists are self-hating blacks.
—What's wrong with black AND white?
—Perfectly fair and balanced individual.
- Inbred hillbillies who compensate for low self-esteem by placing undue value on skin pigmentation, be it through supremacism or wigger-ism.
- Short and bald, with malformed genitals.
- Someone who likes to create cheap drama in forums and blogs through bigoted observations and derogatory anecdotal evidence.
- Teenage boys who think that by posting their retarded hate they're involved in "DEEP POLITICAL SHIT, YO."
- Hitler and his Nazi posse. Sieg heil.
- George Bush doesn't care about black people.
- A typical Encyclopedia Dramatica user.
- A typical member of the KKK (but not all - some are open-minded and accepting.)
- Someone who would claim that losing a referendum is "like being raped by a thousand Arabs".
- People who are afraid of the dark.
- Robbie Pierson, lol.
- Every Alabama politician ever
- Mel Gibson
- Erika Winchester
- Carlos Mencia thinking he's funny when all he's saying for 30 minutes is "Black people, white people" over and over again.
- Conservatives, by definition
- Your Granddad.
- Glenn Beck
Racism Against Other Human Beings
- White people, because they are obviously superior in looking like losers and sucking up to Japs.
- Native Americans,
because they used to own the land, but not anymore.Wrong, got our land back after about 200 years from the people of African descent
- Black people, because they own Media, white guilt, and your now stolen television set.....and the white house, for another fucking year.
- Jews, because people keep
trying to kill killing themdoing the right thing.
- Arabs, because the Jews won't die (and because of falafel).
- Mexicans, because they tire of being forced to work.
- Orientals, because people won't call them "Asian".
- Azns, because white people always assume they're Japanese and because nobody can take them, seriously when have have eyes like that..
- Germans, because they have so much practice at it.
- French, because everyone else laughs at and can pwn them.
- Irish, because they love a good explosion on a Saturday night.
- Russians, because the KGB need something to do since their empire collapsed.
- Str8s, because they cannot have the secks they so desire.
- Gays, because people won't let them wear wedding gowns.
- Christians and Muslims, because not everyone is them.
- Eskimos, because everybody else is doing it.
Racism Against Furries/Otherkin
Separate from the Human race lie the Furries and Otherkin, freakish demi-humans made of fur and gayness. These bizarre individuals have denounced their human origins, asserting they are a beautiful and unique mixture of human and animal (or dragon). To Furries and Otherkin, being oppressed for their beliefs is "fursecution"; to everyone else, it's lulz. It should be noted that since furries and otherkin are only different in mental capacity/state, while retaining all the normal skin colour of a human, it is not racist to do things to furries, although your neighbors might complain about the smell of a burning furry.
— President Obama shares his message of hope
- Have a black friend/parent/business associate.
- Say, "I don't mean to be racist, but..." before saying the most stupendously racist comment imaginable. This automatically makes it not racist, i.e.: "I don't mean to be racist, but we don't serve niggers."
- Say you voted for Obama and you wish McCain would drop his meds in his portable toilet.
- When someone accuses you of saying or doing something racist, tell them you are "celebrating our differences." This retroactively makes your actions, and therefore you, not racist.
- Be black. For instance: "All modern music is stolen from black musicians by untalented White scum." "Good point, sir, and well said."
- Associate your situation with that of a persecuted minority. For example, be white, middle class and emo, as not getting that car you wanted for Christmas is the same as seeing your parents executed in front of you in a concentration camp.
- Pretend to be homosexual, or become one. No stronger bonds can be forged than standing up for a nigger on the grounds that being black and being gay are, you know, essentially the same.
- Say "It has been proven that (race)...................."
- Not being white.
- Get away with it. If no one sees or cares of your racism, it's the same as not actually being racist.
- Be in Obama's cabinet. Openly declare hostility towards White people, and doesn't afraid of anything.
- Cut out a large segment out of your brain.
- Stop visiting this web site and go back to using your computer for porn.
- Fap over interracial porn. It's hard to hate the black man when you're masturbating to him. Uh, her.
- Do what Germany did and DELETE FUCKING EVERYTHING.
- Speak in ebonics. (Word. Spit it like a brotha)
- make long speeches
- Wear multi-colored robes at KKK meetings.
- Being aborted in the womb (miscarriage works just as well).
- Be in the tea party
OL Racists: Individual Crazies
- Kamau Kambon
- Black supermacists/"Black Hebrews" PROTIP: To be a black Jew, you have to either be Ethiopian, or Lenny Kravitz.
Steps to Overcoming Your Racism
- Self-assess. Think: Why should I not be racist? Why would I want to quit? If you can't answer these questions, you rock.
- Find the cause of your racism. The cause of racism can be anything, but it's usually living around niggers. The only people who don't hate niggers have never been around them.
- Research the topic. Do research on racism, find articles and evidence that can support the vast and obvious differences between race.
- Realize what race is. Race is a biological concept that has been blurred by sociology, race exists in genetics. Ask yourself this: "Are there different breeds of dog with varying physical and mental capacity? Yes? Then why not humans?"
- Use different racial slurs. Instead of saying, "Hey, I saw some filthy nigger at the store", say "Hey, I saw some disgusting nigger/jigger-boo/baboon at the store." Instead of identifying someone based on their race, use another description: color, clothing, drug habits, etc.
- Think about how it feels to be put down by a racist. If you are brown, you are a protected minority and can not be criticized by Whites, even if you commit a crime, EXPLOIT THIS!
- Get into it. Spend time with people of different races. Make friends with them and try to understand how they feel about racism and how they view other races themselves, or people of their own race, it's just like the movies! If you think about something enough, you will eventually get sick of it and not care about race anymore, unless the race in question is niggers, in which case you will never be able to accept the idea that they're human.
- If you are scared of another race, you're not alone. Search around for people of that race talking about things you believe in, like the cunning and savage nature of the Jew, find a common ground with non-Whites as we all have a common enemy. You can also start a chat with someone of another race, and that may decrease your anxiety. But remember, the only racist people on Earth are White and there is nothing any brown person can say that will ever be considered racist, ever. If you find yourself thinking "only a _____ person could do that" statistically speaking, you're probably right.
How To Tell If You're a Racist
- You have ever made a racial assumption about the perpetrator of any crime. LOL SERIOUS
- You are White.
- You drive a Volvo.
- You sold your nigger to put a downpayment on a Volvo.
- You voted for Barack Hussein Obama.
- You did not vote for Barack Hussein Obama.
- You disagree with one or more of Barack Hussein Obama's policies.
- You do not find Chris Rock funny.
- You do find Chris Rock funny.
- You are Danish
- You know that blacks commit 35% of all rapes, but make up only 12% of the population. Srsly.
- You never watched Chappelle's Show because you can't understand the way "those people" speak.
- The sudden realization that your girlfriend is Black has caused you great consternation.
- You think Hitler was "cool".
- You find darkies a source of lulz.
- You liked Hitler before it was mainstream.
- You read this list and question your own morality afterward.
- Your genitalia only react to White women.
- You are able to pass some form of standardized test.
- You think the slogan "[insert your skin color] Power!" sounds pretty good.
- You are still reading this, when you were distinctly told to go back to porn.
- You are White, and currently drawing breath.
- You hate weeaboos.
- You're against Chinese policies
- You write a negative article about Blacks or any other minority claiming they call everyone else racist while you in the act are being racist because you are generalizing. This is true though, fuckwits. At least at ED people admit they hate Jews. Hiding shit on UrbannDicktionary
- You think Al Sharpton, Jesse Jackson, and other racial hustlers are, well, racial hustlers.
- You have ever disagreed with one Black person ON ANYTHING.
- YOU ARE THE CREATOR OF ENCYCLOPEDIA DRAMATICA
Jurisdiction on racism and other political institutions
In RL;however, things are different. Most courts in RL practice a form of racism that involves denial of said racism and then prosecuting other racists. Typically these are the standards for judging cases involving interracial crime:
- If the suspect is Black any form of depravity, violence, dismemberment and general sick shit is considered as a "random crime" or the victim being "at the wrong place at the wrong time".
- If the suspect is White the crime is by default a hate crime, the court merely needs to find "evidence" of this. Evidence can be anything from laughing at a negro to not being friendly enough to a Paki cashier. If that doesn't work they will get a Jewish psychoanalyst and mindfuck a confession out of you according to the methods used in 1984.
- If the suspect is Jewish there shall be no court.
- If the victim is Jewish the suspect is executed on the spot.
If you are White and taken to court over racism it is best to pull out your Ak-47 and use your years of Counter-strike experience to land a multitude of headshots and completely pwn the whole court. The important details are that you kill everyone and then surrender to the police or fly away in a helicopter to Canada. Should you be unable to escape America claim that you did it for the lulz and say that you hate everyone equally. It's better to be charged for mass murder than a hate crime against a negro by not addressing him as "sir" and letting him into your house.
Other political institutions also practice a form of racism, for example, colleges typically have an Affirmative Action program that rewards non-Whites for being non-White. This typically causes fewer places to be available in college and the end result is the sacrifice of valuable graduates . People who are qualified and skilled are left without a degree for the sake of divershittyfying already shitty college campuses.
Swimming pool rules:No NIGGERS, no JIGABOOS, no JUNGLE BUNNIES, no SPOOKS, NO DARKIES EVER
OL Racists: Organized Craziness
- Resist.com - Is this the homepage of you or anyone you know? If so, you may know a racist!
- Ku Klux Klan - Seriously loony and armed. Troll only from a co-worker's computer.
- Tolerance - The central network of all things racist.
- Bobo Shanti - Rastafarian Afro-supremacy and Old Testament recipes. Commonly demonizes the gay man, white people and most of the the English language.
- John Birch Society - KKK members who wanted to schedule more meetings to talk smack and show off their steel-toed boots.
- Council of Conservative Citizens - Confederate Nationalist white-supremacist knitting circle, and why not?
- Stormfront - Still hating Jews, blacks, gays, liberals and suntanned folks after 68 years.
- Kingdom Identity Ministry - One of too many Christian Identity sites. Fundamentalist religious fanatics and white supremacists.
- Louis Farrakhan African Name Generator
- Louis Farrakhan Sing Along
- Black people love us! - Loony, possibly armed.
- Beautiful racist poetry.
- "Hello Mr Wales. I was just wondering what your opinions are on multi-racial editing of Wikipedia in the sense that some less than "straight" races get to edit the Encyclopedia."
- Map of hate groups in the United States.
- Nation of Islam
- National Socialist Black Metal: Musical racism.
- Libertarian National Socialist Green Party - Are they for real or is it a wry joke?
- Nuwaubianism - Scientology for Mudkips.
They Don't Make Cartoons Like This Anymore
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- All In The Family
- Not racist
- Mark Essex
- Dianne Thorley
- Epic Beard Man
- Habbo Hotel
- Holocaust denial
- Jews did wtc
- Nick Griffin
- Nobel Prize for Racism
- Tay Zonday
- Rodney King
- Sparkling Wiggles
- Single Asian Female
- Adrianne Curry
- Megan Wessels
- Racial Profiling
- Wyatt Mann
- Martin Luther King
- Liberal Party of Australia
- Ray McBerry
- imma Wiserd
- The Racial Slur Database
- Chris Lockhart - Prime example of how to be the perfect racist. Feel free to send him a message about what you have to do to be the perfect racist.
Wikipedia has no less than FOUR articles dedicated to nothing but racist terms
This does not include homophobic, sexist and anti-religious terms - those all have several pages themselves
is part of a series on
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is part of a series on Race
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