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Nurse-kun

From Encyclopedia Dramatica

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I really wish there was magic in the world. I would do anything for there to be magic that could make her(Amputee-chan), make everything, all right again.
 

 

—Nurse-Kun

Amputee-chan. 'Nuff said.

Nurse-kun !!hPl7vWPKR+W is a registered male nurse who posted to 4chan when his boring everyday life in a nursing home was interrupted by the arrival of a 7-year-old girl. At first he merely thought this an interesting thing to tell Anonymous about, but they pressed him to take action...

During the course of this story, the magic of the story changed Anonymous. Anonymous pressed Nurse-kun to adopt, made the little girl laugh, and worked tirelessly to search for Nurse-kun when he disappeared.

His first /b/ post appeared on the 17th of December, 2006, and had been updated regularly thereafter until June 2nd of 2007, when the posting stopped abruptly.

This story, along with Blindmute Loli, were considered one of 4chan's greatest, equal to Densha Otoko of 2channel.

---

The threads were documented in real time on Wikichan, where it was dubbed "Damaged Goods". However after a server crash, all of the fanart was lost and the story was almost lost forever. The story was then hosted on Shii's site, which also went down. Backups were made on Encyclopedia Dramatica.

In 2012, upon discovery of the original threads on a lost Megaupload link by Sarafan, the Bibliotheca Anonoma began a restoration project to extract missing parts of the story that Sarafan overlooked, along with the actual posts that Nurse-kun replied to. It's some very interesting bonus content for old and new readers alike.


Contents

Outline

On December 16th, a unique thread was posted on 4chan. It was about an anon was working in a hospital with indisposed people, and there was a new patient which he had come to realize would make an interesting story for Anonymous. The patient was seven years old, half-Japanese and half-Scandinavian, and had a gymnast's body which even he, a non-pedophile, found attractive. To make the story even more interesting, the girl had three limbs amputated. With absolutely nothing in mind, the anon cynically posted a thread asking whether he should stick it in her pooper. (But it was totally satire. Totally.)

The thread got a lot of suitably amused posts, but just as many other anons wanted to know the details, so he began supplying them. Anonymous also gave suggestions of things he might actually do to be nice to her, but the anon explained that he had thought about this and realized that the girl would probably tell one of her several therapists. To be affectionate was to risk his job.

Anonymous was angry and demanded more than just pooper jokes. Surprised by this outpouring of sympathy from even the worst of the worst, he realized he had to summon up his courage, get off of /b/, and offer the girl the human affection that she needed.

And thus the anon was dubbed Nurse-kun, the girl became Amputee-chan, and the saga began.

Characters

Amputee-chan

 
 
I have no future. Nobody wants me anymore.
 

 

—Amputee-chan

Amputee-chan is the adopted child of the anon known as Nurse-kun.

According to his story she is half-Norwegian, half-Japanese, blond, green eyed, and missing both legs above the knees due to a car crash. She is also missing her right arm below the elbow. With her immediate family dead, and her relatives leaving her for dead, she has been abandoned in a nursing home as a ward of the state.

She enjoys gaming, teddy bears, and beating up racist shitheads. Turn offs include nightmares about her dead parents, losing at DDR, and professional behavior on the part of medical professionals.

Anonymous

 
 
Adopt her?
 

 

—Anonymous 12/16/06(Sat)14:38:47 No.17396289

Something was different today. For once, Anonymous was not the typical face it usually is.

While they ramble in some colorful discussions (In the thread right before they were laughing at the "Lolocaust"), Nurse-kun's story led Anonymous to respond with a mix array of emotive replies, sharing Nurse-kun's desire to heal. Anonymous even drew some nice pictures for Amputee-chan in an effort to make the girl happy.

Reactions

His /b/ threads have become legendary. The two or three hundred replies his posts receive fall into roughly one of four categories:

  1. I don't habeeb it!
  2. You are a sick, sick fuck.
  3. Your story warms my heart because I'm illiterate and didn't notice that you're a pedophile.
  4. Your story warms my heart because I'm a pedophile.

The pedophilia expressed in his first post later disappeared in the later ones. It seems that he either became a good man, or was covering something up. This makes them especially creepy to those who had read prior posts.

The Actual Story

In 2012, the Bibliotheca Anonoma launched the Damaged Goods Remastering Project that restores the original chapter summaries from Wikichan, extracts missing portions of the story that Sarafan overlooked due to floods of shitposting, and the actual posts that Nurse-kun replied to. It adds some very interesting bonus content for old and new readers alike.

Click here to read the Damaged Goods Remastering Project

---

Old backups from Wikichan

(Finally) The Ending

Nurse-kun wasn't heard from on 4chan for well over a year, leaving many of his fans hanging and the story unfinished. In late September of 2008 he showed up suddenly in /tg/ in a thread about Warhammer, where he simply stated:

 
 
Okay, okay, fine. Summary.

She's doing fine, I'm doing fine, we're doing fine together, in a new place, which we're (well, I'm) renting, her education and various therapies are going quite well.

My father died, my family and I have been dealing with it as best we can, my mom loves her, she likes my mom, and various other members of the family to varying degrees.

I've been working part-time at a new job, and that's going pretty well. She enjoys Avatar, Dawn of War, my Muppet Show DVDs, and we play a mean dual-game of the touhous.

Ze end. Back to discussion of OP's quandry.
 


 

—Nurse-Kun

Trailer For "Scarred"
Based On This Story


Original Thread Archives

Here is an archive with all the original 4chan thread snapshots of this story. Look at it and update this story as necessary, you will have a new outlook on this awesome story. If not for the quick action of the Bibliotheca Anonoma, this archive would have been permanently lost when Megaupload was shut down on January 2012.

It also includes the original fanart, so get this and update the pitiful gallery below. As a bonus, there's a bunch of unsaved copypasta from Wikichan. Discovering this data was the equivalent of entering King Tut's tomb.

We definitely do not want to lose this again, so download it now and make tons of mirrors.

Fan Art

I've found an archive containing every single piece of fanart made for this story here, please update!

See Also

External Links

Wikichan logo.png Nurse-kun is part of a series on Wikichan
A Collection Of Incest ConfessionsBlindmute LoliCandlejackCheeriosFukia SikingITT, we discuss the crazies we have met in our lifetime.Insult my WiiJenNavy boatsNurse-kunPizza Delivery GuyRoommate from HellSadakoShiiShowing /b/ to my sisterSkittlesThe Weirding WayThe Well-Cultured AnonymousTitoWOMAN SUPER PUNCH OUTWeirdest Bitch Ever
CHANSPORTAL NEW.png

Nurse-kun is part of a series on

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Featured article December 29, 2008
Preceded by
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Nurse-kun Succeeded by
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