You'd think that a radical Pagan vampire warlock Cherokee ninja ufo-conspiracy theorist couldn't possibly get any crazier. And you'd be wrong. He could always think that he is a superhero.
James Paul Von Helton has the dubious distinction of having crammed more insane bullshit into his head than any other person in the world. Most online nutjobs are content to JUST think that the aliens are out to get them, or that their surgeon wants to kill them for being a transsexual, VonHelton goes the extra mile to incorporate absolutely everything into his crazy fantasy world. However, the thing that really makes VonHelton stand out from the teeming masses of the internet is that he believes that he is the Marvel comic book character, The Punisher.