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Longcat

From Encyclopedia Dramatica

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Another pic of Shiroi (Longcat). Isn't she adorable?
Ruler.jpg
This article needs moar long.
You can help by adding moar long.

One day, there was a picture of a cat. It was not Caturday but this specific cat was so long it became a meme and, though the day was not specifically the day of cats, this cat's length became famous. Originating from 2ch, it is a sacred meme that embodies the spirit of the lulz, as it has touched the hearts of every anon and /b/tard in the internets. All attempts made by faggots who desire to steal it from anon have earned the swift, unmerciful wrath of the Internet Hate Machine.

Longcat is a real cat (obviously). For some reason when Longcat's uninspired owners named him, they must have overlooked the extremely fucking huge length of the kitten, and they named her after her second most defining feature. Therefore Longcat's real name is Shiroi (白い), which means "white" in Japanese. This may, however, be an azn mind game to confuse black people who believe they are the longest members of the human species.

Contents

The legend

Behold, the end of all that we know and love. The Marcab Confederacy's Deathstar Longcat.
An accurate depiction.


Longcat did WTC
Obey the Longcat

Noone knows how long Longcat actually is. The figure above gives an estimated length of 10,000 ft, however this number has been verified by science. The most successful space mission to measure Longcat had to turn back and recharge their lasers after just 9000 feet and one inch in the air.

Possible Origin

There is a quote by Einstein that may have been the source of inspiration for this meme:

 
 
You see, wire telegraph is a kind of a very, very long cat. You pull his tail in New York and his head is meowing in Los Angeles. Do you understand this? And radio operates exactly the same way: you send signals here, they receive them there. The only difference is that there is no cat.
 

 

Albert Einstein

The prophecy

It has been prophesied that during Catnarok Longcat will do epic battle with Tacgnol for the fate of the universe.

It is said that Longcat is part of a fursome of powerful cats that, when brought together, shall restore peace and harmony throughout the land.

 
 
There shall be Four. One of Air, his fur white as snow. His power shall enlighten the masses, and herald the beginning. The second of Earth, black as the night. The darkness will be overwhelming, but do not fear! He has come as a harbinger of the goodness to come. The thrice appearance of a creature of great length, this one coloured as though wrapped in the very flame it represents, will appear to assuade our fears of the nigh end.Though it will be met with hate and loathing, it shall soldier on to aid us. The final, the fourth, shall emerge from the great oceans as though it was born of them, joining it's brothers and spreading harmony as it walks.

Together, the Four Felines will combine their great power, and summon a fifth, a creature of pure heart, radiant and beautiful. He, mighty and virile, will open the soul of all followers, and lead them to the land of ultimate delight. Never again will people have to buy dogs or get in their cars! No more will innocent yellow vans tremble at the approaching horde! The fruit of our reptilian labors will come, and feline power shall rule to cosmos!
 


 

Raptor Jesus

tl;dr

The Longcat family

Moar family?!

The Longcat remix

Shortcat is closely related to Longcat, but what of his other family members? Recently a DNA test confirmed that Longcat is blood-related to the bastardized Shatcat

It is also a well known fact that Binkers is son of longcat.

Longcat facts

  • Many new users speculate that Longcat cat is not lengthy, but it is in fact long.
  • Longcat and Speedycat are not just dating but have actually had an offspring named Splongcat.
  • Longcat is the longest substance known to man.

ASCII Longcat (click plus to uncollapse)

For your flooding pleasure.

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   |Longcat|
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   | THE   |
   | GAME  |
   |       |
   |       |
   |       |
   |       |
   /        \
  /   ____   \
  |  /    \  |
  | |      | |
 /  |      |  \
 \__/      \__/

Longcat is looooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooong

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Loooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooongcat.JPG
Longcat in its natural habitatz.


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Longercat.GIF
IRL Longcat


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Longcatbalrog.jpg
Longcat in a dark cave


YouTuber confused about the care of Longcats (Tacgnols in this case)

The following video contains a nerd

Gallery

Longallery is looooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooong About missing Pics

See also

External Links

Portal memes.png

Longcat is part of a series on

Memes

Visit the Memes Portal for complete coverage.



Longcat
is part of a series on
Internet Cats

A Cat Is Fine TooArguecatBasement CatBikecatBincatBinkersBonsai KittenBukkake MilkBurgerBusiness CatCat in MicrowaveCat on a keyboard in spaceCatnarokCeiling CatChase 'No Face'CovercatDangerous KittenDeath CatDodge CatDrillcatEmo CatFishing CatFrinkleGarfieldGrumpy CatHappycatHipster KittyIf it fits I sitsInception CatJarcatJewcatKeyboard CatKitlerLasercatLenincatLimecatLongcatMaruUser:Mr Jonzz/SKCNyan CatOctocatOrvillecopterPeterSerious CatShironekoShocked and Appalled CatShortcatShotacatSilencer CatSpaghetti CatSpeedycatStanding CatStarecatStalking CatStubbs the mayorcatTacgnolThat Fucking CatTrollcatsTubcatTulipUser:Hipcrime/YOUR PETWeathercatZippocat

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