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Gary Oak

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WHAT-A-MOTHERFUCKER!

Gary Motherfucking Oak is a Pokémon-based 4chan meme originating on /v/, which soon spread to other boards, such as /b/. Although Gary Oak threads are almost always epic, there are many who will dismiss this meme and h8 on Gary Oak with an unrivaled passion. Additionally, you can often locate a thread or discussion of Gary Oak by the heated, rampant, pointless debate and faggotry with which this meme is associated.

Contents

Who is Gary Oak?

Gary Oak, the real motherfucker.
When you see it...

He shows up to challenge you when you have just done something great and are worn down.

You are standing second in line for your brand new Wii console. There is one left on the shelf and guess who's right in front of you? GARY MOTHERFUCKING OAK.

You have just been rewarded with your Masters Degree in Cancer Research. In ten minutes you are going to have an interview to get the job of a lifetime with a six digit salary. You'll be able to pay off your student loans no problem. You flip on the TV right before you leave and what do you see? GARY MOTHERFUCKING OAK has just found the cure for cancer.

You're training on Route 22 for Brock's Gym, your Pokémon are tired, and who do you see? GARY MOTHERFUCKING OAK.

You just beat Lance, the last one of the Elite Four, with all of your revives and healing items used up and being almost raped by his onslaught of shitting dick nipples. In the middle of jamming the A-button, he says you WOULD be the champion, but who has to be in the next room that's so bare it's epic? GARY MOTHERFUCKING OAK.

It's 1997 and you're downloading Pokémon porn on your 56k modem. Oh boy, this zip file full of Misty nudes only has 10 minutes left. You've been waiting six hours for this. When the file gets to 99.9%, you start unzipping your pants and are getting ready for the fap of your life. At that moment, guess who picks up the phone and disconnects you? GARY MOTHERFUCKING OAK.

You have just fended off a shark, you are bloody and tired but you can climb onto the boat when who shows up to stomp your fingers? GARY MOTHERFUCKING OAK.

Your on the Titanic, its sinking, you're in the lifeboat, its the last one and there is only room for one more person, who takes the last seat? GARY MOTHERFUCKING OAK.

You and your girlfriend (both virgins) are ready to have sex for the first time. At the moment you get nude and horny and ready to bang your bitch, GARY MOTHERFUCKING OAK already took away her virginity. Good luck getting another virgin from CraigList.

Congratulations, You have finally beaten Gary Oak and have no healing items left over. You head over to the Pokemon center and then the PokeMart, guess who blocks the entrance to the Pokemart. GARY MOTHERFUCKING OAK That's Right, Gary Oak is just that Epic

You and your wife have been trying to have kids for a while now. It turns out, you're infertile. You go to a sperm clinic, and have your wife artificially inseminated. 18 years later. Your son is finally told that you are not his biological father. He goes on a quest to find out who he was. Turns out, your son was murdered while walking in tall grass. Who killed that idiot with his fat dick? GARY MOTHERFUCKING OAK.

You're walking home at night and a nigger attacks you with a knife. You are able to drive him off using years of karate lessons, still sustaining some deep knife wounds. Guess who shows up and asks you for your wallet with a baseball bat? Gary MOTHERFUCKING OAK, that's who.

Gary Oak just finished owning your ass with kung-fu. He's walking to the hospital to recover from the wounds he got. He's tired. He crashes into a mirror, and ends up in a coma. Why? Because not even GARY MOTHERFUCKING OAK is safe from GARY MOTHERFUCKING OAK.

How it started

Gary Oak Touches Everyone.jpg

I firmly believe Gary should be the rival in every Pokémon game. No, I don't care if he's 45 by the time Diamond and Pearl or whatever is out.

He should also continue to be a total dick like he was from day 1. He was 10 years old driving around a convertible and had bitches at his beck and call. This should continue.

Whenever you enter a cave and come out with all your Pokémon are at 3 hit points? Gary appears.

Get through Team Rocket HQ, out of any healing items with your best team reduced to rubble? Gary rolls up in his Mercedes.

When you finally attain all the badges you need, with your favorite Pokèmon battered and beaten? Yeah, Gary.

All your Pokémon are knocked out and you're 5 tiles away from the Pokémon Center -- Guess who just blocked the entrance way and says he challenges you to a fight?

Fuck yeah, Gary Oak.

This copy pasta, attempted in /v/ many moons ago, appeared on November 19th in the middle of the afternoon, and created over 150+ image replies and over 600 posts. /b/tards, old and new alike, begging for a decent meme, have found it within Gary Oak - that son of a bitch whom appears at all the right places at all the wrong times for you. Always a minute before, and always telling you a minute too late.

Gary Shows Up IRL

A screenshot of the epic tale. /b/ was unaware this was copy-pasta'd/stolen from another post made earlier in '08
 
 
I fell asleep thinking that I may have indeed found the man of my life, and that I was going to wake up in the morning and have sex with him...To waking up with dried cum in my hair, face, eyes, bed etc.. Almost walking on a pile of shit on my bathroom floor. To empty fridge and trash can used as a urinal...
 

 

—Disgruntled cumdumpster

 
 
I was late for an appointment and I needed to park in the town square. In a moment of incredible luck I found a vacant space near the building I wanted to get to. The space was in between an SUV and a coned-off zone. I had my blinker on and was pulled up against the car in front of the space, ready to back up. All of a sudden, this woman zooms through the cones and pulls into the space, almost hitting me.
 

 

—Yes, Gary Oak will sometimes dress up as a woman. Attack on May 29, 2010

Previous Quote | Next Quote

IS DAT SUM DELISHUS COPYPASTAS!?

Gallery

Gary Motherfucking Oak About missing Pics

The Song

Use scrollbar to see the full text


WAKE UP IN THE MORNING


FEELING LIKE THE KING
GRAB MY BITCHES
HEAD TO THE CAR
I’M GONNA GET SOME BLING


BEFORE I FIGHT
MOW DOWN SOME POKES
WITH THE FRONT OF MY CAR
CAUSE WHEN I LEAVE FOR THE GYM
I’M GONNA FUCKING WIN


I’M TALKING BADGES ON MY ID-D
GONNA GIVES BITCHES A GARY STD-D
GARY’S BLOWIN UP EVERYONE ON THE SCENE-ENE
DROPPING TROU GIVIN TRAINERS A LOOK-SEE
PULLING UP TO BATTLES
GONNA KNOCK THIS FUCKER UNTIL HE BLEEEEEDS


GARY OAK
GONNA MAKE YOU CHOKE
ON MY IMPOSSIBLY HUGE GIRTH
TONIGHT IM’A WIN
AND KNOCK YOU ON YOUR FUCKING BACK
THAT DIDN’T RHYME
NOT A CRIME
BECAUSE I’M FUCKING GARY OAK OH
WOAH OH OH OH
OH WOAH OH OH



GARY OAK
GONNA MAKE YOU CHOKE
ON MY IMPOSSIBLY HUGE GIRTH
TONIGHT IM’A WIN
AND KNOCK YOU ON YOUR FUCKING BACK
THAT DIDN’T RHYME
NOT A CRIME
BECAUSE I’M FUCKING GARY OAK OH
WOAH OH OH OH
OH WOAH OH OH


AIN’T A TRAINER IN THE WORLD
THAT CAN BEAT ME AT LIFE
I GOT SOME MONEY IN MY POCKETS
BECAUSE I’M NOT FAGGOT ASH
AND THE TRAINERS ARE LINING UP
BECAUSE THEY HERE I’M MUCH TOUGHER
BUT I’LL KICK THEIR FUCKING FACES IN
BECAUSE I’M A HARDCORE MOTHERFUCKER


I’M TALKING BOUT
ASSES KICKED LEFT AND RIGHT (RIGHT)
NOT EVEN PUTTING UP A FIGHT (FIGHT)
GOD THIS BITCH IS WAY TOO TIGHT (TIGHT)
OH WAIT I FORGOT IT’S YOUR MOTHER (MOTHER)
IT’S YOUR MOTHER (MOTHER)
YEAH I FUCKED YOUR (MOTHER)



GARY OAK
GONNA MAKE YOU CHOKE
ON MY IMPOSSIBLY HUGE GIRTH
TONIGHT IM’A WIN
AND KNOCK YOU ON YOUR FUCKING BACK
THAT DIDN’T RHYME
NOT A CRIME
BECAUSE I’M FUCKING GARY OAK OH
WOAH OH OH OH
OH WOAH OH OH



GARY OAK
GONNA MAKE YOU CHOKE
ON MY IMPOSSIBLY HUGE GIRTH
TONIGHT IM’A WIN
AND KNOCK YOU ON YOUR FUCKING BACK
THAT DIDN’T RHYME
NOT A CRIME
BECAUSE I’M FUCKING GARY OAK OH
WOAH OH OH OH
OH WOAH OH OH


HEY ASH
YOU’RE SUCH A FAG
LOL WHAT’S THE OPPOSITE OF FAG
WHATEVER IT IS
IT SURE AS HELL AIN’T YOU
MY GOD YOUR POKEMON SUCK
GONNA KICK YOUR ASS
YOUR ASS IS MINE
YEAH LIKE YOUR MOTHER’S (ASH)
HEY GRAMPS YOU THERE
IT’S ME, FUCKING GARY
YOUR ONLY GRANDSON
I’M THE ONLY GOOD THING IN YOUR LIFE
SHIT YOU’RE SO OLD
GIVE ME MONEY
I’M GARY MOTHERFUCKING OAK
GARY MOTHERFUCKING OAK
YEAH I’M GARY MOTHERFUCKING
OOOOAAAAKKK!


NOW HAND OVER THAT BADGE YOU PIECE OF SHIT



GARY OAK
GONNA MAKE YOU CHOKE
ON MY GIRTH
TONIGHT IM’A WIN
AND KNOCK YOU ON YOUR FUCKING BACK
THAT DIDN’T RHYME
NOT A CRIME
BECAUSE I’M FUCKING GARY OAK OH
WOAH OH OH OH
OH WOAH OH OH




GARY OAK
GONNA MAKE YOU CHOKE
ON MY IMPOSSIBLY HUGE GIRTH
TONIGHT IM’A WIN
AND KNOCK YOU ON YOUR FUCKING BACK
THAT DIDN’T RHYME
NOT A CRIME
BECAUSE I’M FUCKING GARY OAK OH
WOAH OH OH OH
OH WOAH OH OH


WOAH OH OH OH
OH WOAH OH OH

FUCK YEAH I'M GARY


Videos

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See also

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Gary Oak is part of a series on

Memes

Visit the Memes Portal for complete coverage.

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Gary Oak is part of a series on

Television

Visit the Television Portal for complete coverage.

Featured article March 14, 2010
Preceded by
Kitsune Youkai
Gary Oak Succeeded by
Akmal Shaikh
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